Years withered away, yet the quest endured. The company had been reduced one knight after another, until only Percival remained. The curse of his pure heart. Temptation whispered ever louder to sit beside the road in this barren, blasted land and give up. What was the point now? Or then? Continue reading
Mom suggested the job fair. Nobody is hiring a one-handed man with a substance abuse problem. She never listens.
Hanging with the guys on the dock, sipping buckets of rum was my ambition.
Encountering Continue reading
As the Minister of Propaganda, Vlad’s had it all. Buying himself extravagant presents was something he truly enjoyed, but his favorite was floating on his 100-foot yacht all winter, hoisting champagne with his companions.
When the call came to return to the Continue reading
Emmitt blamed all the world’s problems on the bullhorn that stalked him. “Get over here!” “There!” “Stop!” The bullhorn bellowed commands, steamrolling his Pollyanna disposition.
For Christmas, Santa brought him headphones. “Everything is Awesome” could envelope him in a sonic cone nearing nirvana. Emmitt was giddy with glee. He knew exactly what he would do. Continue reading
Always watch where you are going. But the paparazzi never let up, do they? My cool shades are a must, even in dark stairwells. There was an exit sign, right? Glowing red? So pedestrian. Continue reading
Sigurd was a born entrepreneur. He’d identified his market as a little boy, and determined his future business was to establish a barber shop. He even subscribed to Beards and Mustaches Quarterly to kickstart his dream. Continue reading
I drive the garbage truck. I get up at three every day, drive my routes, and go home to do it again.
So you could say I’ve seen a lot of garbage in my career.
Today, boss wouldn’t let me drive my route. Ticks me off. Continue reading
Wally was given an assignment. He had to get the chicken, lion, and grain across the river in his boat.
The chicken went across easy peasy without so much as a cluck. He rowed back. The chicken blinked at him on the shore in some chicken variant of Morse code. Continue reading
“Milton! It’s time to walk the dog!”
I started, fumbling a beaker of potion and nearly exterminating myself. “Mom! Please!” Truth was that she was just being a witch. Continue reading
Mothers disburse sage advice always. Brush your teeth. Bring clean underwear. Drive defensively. Just say no. Steer clear of fast stuff. It’s all part of the online mother certification process.
The twins weren’t deaf. Continue reading
